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Week Twenty Picks: The Bonus Round

1/21/2018

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After last weekend's games, I feel as though nothing really matters at this point, but not in a bad way.

One of the things I've always hated about watching football is when a team I absolutely despise makes the big game at the end. Sure, it gives me something to root against, but if that team wins, it just leaves me with a terrible feeling. This season, I don't think I'll have a problem with any of these teams making the big game. I think it'd be awesome if Jacksonville and/or Minnesota won. If I'm being honest, the thought of either of those teams winning it all makes me quite happy. Though not necessarily a popular opinion, I actually like the Pats, and as far as I'm concerned, Danny Amendola can have all the rings. And, sure, I give the Philly fans a hard time, but it would be great for Nick Foles to win after all the crap he's been through, and any team that has Chris Long on it negates pretty much any asshole who plays or roots for said team.

All this aside, I'm just incredibly, unbelievably, indescribably grateful that Pittsburgh is out. In a league with no shortage of garbage human beings, the Pittsburgh Steelers are, collectively as an organization, from top to bottom, the most comprehensive collection of assholes in the entire league. Just having to endure watching them play damages me as a human being. Watching them lose last week was euphoric. After that, everything else is gravy.


Week Twenty

Winner in Bold

This Conference

Jacksonville at New England
I've been saying for a while (you could ask my wife) that the Jags are not the team that the Pats want to face in the playoffs. Historically, Brady has struggled against defences that can pressure him without blitzing, and the Jags are certainly capable of that. Add to that the talent that Jacksonville has in the rest of its defence, and you have a really tough challenge for New England's offence, maybe the toughest it's faced all season. I don't think the Jags will be able to score much against the Pats' vastly underrated defence, so the ultimate key to this game will be New England's patience on offence. The Pats will have to grind it out a bit, try to hit Gronk for the odd decent gainer, get the ball to Dion Lewis in space, and control the clock. Brady has to be willing to throw it away, take a sack, do whatever it takes to keep from turning it over. I'm fascinated by this matchup. I just hope it doesn't get ruined because of Brady's hand injury. Honestly, I think with Brian Hoyer behind Center, as much as I like the guy, the Pats get massacred.


That Conference

Minnesota at Philadelphia

Case Keenum or Nick Foles is going to the big game, which is awesome in my book. Both have an embarrassment of riches at the skill positions, although Adam Thielen is nursing a bad back, which would be a blow to Minnesota's offence. Defence is the key to this game. Philly has a deep and talented defensive front. Minnesota's defence is probably better overall. Points should be hard to come by in this one. I'm ok with that, as I like to watch good defensive play, and I'm not a moron who needs a high-scoring game to keep me interested.
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Week Nineteen Picks: Division Bell

1/13/2018

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This week, with some of the chaff eliminated, we introduce the conference’s top seeds into the playoff mix. In a testament to the type of season it’s been, none of these games are sure things. I’m looking forward to some interesting contests, as at least some of these matchups are quite intriguing.
 
 
Week Nineteen
 
Winner in Bold
 
Saturday
 
Atlanta at Philadelphia
Philly was, for a while at least, the best team in the league, but then they lost Carson Wentz and their offence fell apart. Now they find themselves the NFC’s top seed, and an underdog at home to a team that qualified on the last day of the regular season. Here, I might be tempted to think that Philly is still a very good team, and that they’ll find a way to win this one.  Atlanta is not just any playoff qualifier, though. Though their offence has struggled at times this season, it’s still loaded, and their defence has been outstanding lately. I’d like to say I’m sorry to all the Philadelphia fans, but who am I kidding, it’s Philadelphia; nobody likes them anyway.
 

Tennessee at New England
Here’s how Tennessee wins this game: luck. Don’t laugh, it happens. The Pats commit a couple of early turnovers, their offensive line gets dinged, who knows. Tennessee’s offence is built to grind and protect leads. They just have to get one. On paper, the way the Pats’ offence is playing, this one’s a blowout. They don’t play the games on paper, though, do they?
 
 
Sunday
 
Jacksonville at Pittsburgh
I find it funny how so many seem to be glossing over the Jags’ 30-9 shellacking of Pittsburgh back in October as some kind of aberration. Jacksonville still has the brutal pass rush that forced Roethlisberger into making bad throws, and the Jags still have their ball-hawking secondary to collect any lame ducks that Ben wants to put up. The key here, as everyone knows, is Jacksonville’s offence, and especially Blake Bortles. He doesn’t have to do much, just make a few throws, get some first downs, chew up the clock. What he absolutely can’t do is play like he did in the first half against Buffalo last week. If he gives Pittsburgh’s offence 20-plus minutes of possession in the first half, Pittsburgh will make the Jags pay, and the Jags offence is not built to play from behind.
 

New Orleans at Minnesota
This is probably the surest bet for a good game this weekend. I like this Minnesota team a lot. Their defence is top-tier, their offence is playing great. All the pieces are there. New Orleans is no slouch either, with their two-headed RB monster, Kamaringram, a QB who can still sling it, a solid pass rush, and a talented young secondary. This should be a really good game.
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Week Eighteen Picks: Where The Wild Things Are

1/6/2018

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For a variety of reasons, this year’s playoffs look pretty wide open. None of the top seeds look invincible, and some of the teams playing this weekend certainly have the goods to make deep playoff runs (Not the Bills, though. They’re terrible.). To the winners of this weekend’s games, your prize is, for the AFC, a trip to either Pittsburgh or Foxborough, both challenging, and for the NFC, a trip to either Minnesota (tough) or Philly (maybe not so much…).
 
Week Eighteen
 
Winner in Bold
 
Saturday
 
Tennessee at Kansas City
Both of these teams are lucky to even be in the playoffs, but they’re here, so that’s that. Tennessee will have a hard time scoring points with Demarco Murray out, but might be able to keep this close if their defence plays out of its mind and if Alex Smith starts sailing passes like he did when KC was in its mid-season funk. This is probably the game I’m least looking forward to this weekend.
 
 
Atlanta at LAR
The only way I can see Atlanta taking this one is if Jared Goff and Todd Gurley go in the tank in their first playoff action and turn the ball over a bunch of times, which could happen. With Aaron Donald and Co. coming after him, Matt Ryan could be in for a long game.
 
 
Sunday
 
Buffalo at Jacksonville
Jacksonville has been maddeningly inconsistent this season, but I can’t envision a scenario where Buffalo isn’t completely smothered by the Jags’ defence.
 
 
Carolina at New Orleans
Both defences are playing well, so the question here is whether Cam Newton can will his offence into keeping pace with the superior Saints attack. Maybe Newton makes some big plays, and maybe New Orleans’s young CBs whither under playoff pressure, but New Orleans looks like the safer pick here.
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